Never Been Heard

(formerly The Musings and Learnings of a Widowed Bipolar Mum)

Author: Alice Willow

  • Fall From Grace-Vigilance & Honesty In Self Care

    Yesterday I posted why I haven’t been writing and why I still can’t write for a bit and it’s all very true. But this morning I woke up and realised how I am neglecting myself somewhat and how putting my writing on hold is part of that. Writing is one of my ‘me’ things and…

  • Note To Followers

    Hi Folks, Just a quick update on the silence. I’ve been dealing with my child’s severe Post Viral Fatigue. Made an ambitious decision to do some refurbishment in the middle of it and have also lost my glasses!!! That explains the radio silence. I need to get things together. Take my child to some medical…

  • “The Thoughts” A Poem about Bipolar Hypomania to the structure and rhythm pattern of Edgar Allan Poes’ The Bells

    Feel the creeping joy of thoughts! Incandescent thought, Here the sense of perfect satisfaction sought, How they rise and rush and crackle, In the day and in the night. Sharing Love, Communication Sublime, Euphoric Nation. Losing time, time, time, In a sort of runic rhyme. Feeling emancipation befitting the talk. From the thoughts, thoughts, thoughts,…

  • Has The Lockdown Saved My Mental Health? Are People With A Diagnosed Mental Illness Riding This Out Better Than Those Without?

    This lockdown has been incredibly stressful for me. Especially at the beginning. I was preparing to do one anyway and pull my daughter from school as I didn’t think the government was responding quickly enough but a week before the official closure of everything, she caught the Coronavirus. Luckily I was prepared.             I wasn’t…

  • Bipolar Depression Is A Dark Beast

    Weighing heavy on my chest Rendering me immobile as I lay My best a distant memory Day by day by day Staring into the abyss Disconnecting as you devour me Nothing is worse than this I deteriorate hourly Your ugliness reflects back in the mirror But you’ve taught me not to care I have a…

  • The Temperature Of Coma

    The Temperature Of Coma Staggering down the hallway Feet curled over you broke your flip flop. Struggling to speak, I didn’t know what was to come. Swaying side to side on the sofa Talking gibberish like a drunk, I thought it was the Morphine, I didn’t know what was to come. Seemingly eternal wait for…

  • The Silent Scream

    The Silent Scream-A Scuplture In My living Room Heavy head, metallic and cream, Face lined with fear, a silent scream. Cracked and cold, chills my hand and my heart. This perfect sculpture is where we start. Eyes fiercely pinpricked, A soul that is old, A young aged face, a story untold. Deep-set eyes, Dark shadows…

  • Bipolar Disorder-The Ultimate Guide To Self Management For People Who Find Self Management Difficult

    The phrase ‘Self Management’ is thrown around freely by users and Professionals as being key to recovery and relapse prevention. Some people with Bipolar Disorder seem to have it nailed. They have good self management routines that work for them and are vital to their recovery. From what I read in peoples tweets and self…

  • Self Isolation & Bipolar Disorder, Living with someone with Covid-19

    I am terrified of getting the Coronavirus. I never eat fruit, I don’t eat lunch, last time I had flu I really suffered and was wiped out for 2 weeks following which I got Bronchitis and  post viral fatigue for a further 2 weeks. In fact I’ve had Bronchitis 2 years in a row. I…

  • I Lost My Husband & Found A Piece Of Him In The Royal Albert Hall

                It’s been a challenging couple of weeks. Spring always is for me and it can start quite early. It is my mission this year not to have a Bipolar Depressive Episode. I am being proactive and pushing on with self-management the best way I can. My mood has definitely been on the low side…