Never Been Heard

(formerly The Musings and Learnings of a Widowed Bipolar Mum)

Tag: abuse

  • This is all

    It’s flattering to be called resilient and feel validated when you are down but “resilience” being used as your main compliment time after time can leave you wanting in this way. Sometimes I’d rather be loved than resilient. Or have someone hear my pain. Or be in the position of not having experienced so much […]

  • The Ups and Downs of a Dysregulated Eater Part 2a

    HEALING MY RELATIONSHIP WITH FOOD accountable adjective Definition 1 : subject to giving an account : answerable I said I was documenting this journey in order to have some accountability. Today I feel the need to account for myself. I also have answers, just sadly no solutions yet. It has been a week of ups […]

  • Healing my relationship with food-intro

    For 30 years I’ve had dysregulated eating. At 15, with completely normal weight I went on serious appetite suppressants from a dodgy clinic. I would see how many days I could survive on a packet of Maltesers. I always had a sweet tooth and a taste for the unhealthy. My life has been a series […]

  • My Joy, My Sad

    “Roses are red, violets are blue, It don’t always be like that, but sometimes it do”. It’s been relentless for so long I’d say this is as bad as it gets. Most days an exercise in survival. It started with depression at age 15 and a Bipolar Diagnosis at 21, Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder […]

  • When Will The Tears Come

    I wrote this poem sometime in between my discoveries and trying to feel better. It was a challenging day but I managed to override inertia and inaction with some good self care. I was feeling quite trapped but I managed to carry on despite that and getting moving helped me to feel better. It’s so […]

  • I’m sad today but I have hope

    Hi. Happy Saturday. It was a happy start to the day having a brunch date with my teen where we ate a spectacular pancake stack dripping with Greek yoghurt, fruit compote and loaded with blueberries. I love walking with linked arms down the street with her and having some quality time. She’s so busy these […]

  • BDSM Abuse

    I was a live in prostitute for him Although sometimes he did nice things for me Without him Emotionally destitute I would be. Exchanging comfort for sex Realising his fantasies for love He said that’s what you did if you loved someone And in kind he shared his extraordinary mind. That was a real woman’s […]