Never Been Heard

(formerly The Musings and Learnings of a Widowed Bipolar Mum)

Tag: emotionalabuse

  • Loving a Narcissist

    Into in my life you flounced Self sales pitch left me astounded All my senses surrounded Feet swept off the ground Unaware my mind and body were about to be impounded. You intended to deflower My mind and steal my body like a prowler So insidious I’d not notice, certainly not flounder Even though at […]

  • The Ups and Downs of a Dysregulated Eater Part 2a

    HEALING MY RELATIONSHIP WITH FOOD accountable adjective Definition 1 : subject to giving an account : answerable I said I was documenting this journey in order to have some accountability. Today I feel the need to account for myself. I also have answers, just sadly no solutions yet. It has been a week of ups […]

  • The Ups and Downs of A Dysregulated Eater Part 1

    AKA HEALING MY RELATIONSHIP WITH FOOD Today was my first appointment with the dietician. Ambivalent as I was, having approached the GP with high hopes for a pill to stop me eating, I came out with a dietetics referral. Having long since stopped feeling remorse for eating bad food, and telling myself I didn’t care, […]

  • Healing my relationship with food-intro

    For 30 years I’ve had dysregulated eating. At 15, with completely normal weight I went on serious appetite suppressants from a dodgy clinic. I would see how many days I could survive on a packet of Maltesers. I always had a sweet tooth and a taste for the unhealthy. My life has been a series […]

  • Mummy Poem 2 Reflections on parenting

    You were loving and kind with a strange style of mothering To be honest, for me, it was really quite smothering You wanted me happy, right from the start But your chances of achieving it were really quite stark. The life skills you gave me, inadequate and few, No body hair was permitted, it would […]

  • Mummy Poem 1 (Trigger Physical/Emotional Abuse-mild)

    I can’t remember when you first hit me I can’t remember how often you lost your mind with rage I remember a bad incident at 9 or 10, a bit old for you to behave this way. You shouted, chased me, screamed as was your pattern when you lost control, Grabbing, pushing, manhandling me, Whacking […]

  • In death we did not part-Sometimes that’s a bad thing

    Thanks for staying in my absence. My daughter is well now and gone back to school full time! So I am back to writing. Back to the blog and back to my (new) book. Things have taken a slightly different turn and so will my writing. You have seen my total adoration of my deceased […]